Met Attachment Needs = Secure Attachment

Written By Julie Menanno MA, LMFT, LCPC

Secure Attachment

Met attachment needs are the foundation of a thriving relationship.

When our emotional needs are consistently met, something powerful happens—we develop secure attachment. This isn’t about perfection. It’s about showing up for each other enough of the time to build trust, safety, and connection.

Here’s what secure attachment feels like:

  • We feel wanted

  • We feel validated

  • We know we’ll be there for each other when needed

  • We feel understood

  • We feel appreciated

  • We know we can get it right for each other

  • We know our needs matter to each other

  • We feel like successful partners

  • We feel trusted and trusting

When these needs are consistently met, emotional safety grows—and that’s the heart of a secure bond.

Met Attachment Needs = Secure Attachment

When both partners can rely on each other emotionally, securely attached relationships emerge. These relationships are resilient, emotionally safe, and grounded in mutual care and responsiveness.

It doesn’t require perfection—it requires effort, empathy, and the willingness to keep coming back to connection.

Support for Building Secure Attachment

If you’re ready to deepen emotional connection and create a securely attached relationship, explore:

  • Attachment 101 Course – Learn how attachment styles form, how they show up in relationships, and how to move toward secure functioning.

  • The Secure Love Podcast – Real couples working through attachment challenges in real time.

  • Relationship Coaching – One-on-one support to help you and your partner build a securely attached bond.

“Secure attachment isn’t perfect—it’s two people who know they matter to each other and keep showing up.”
— Julie Menanno

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Julie Menanno MA, LMFT, LCPC

Julie Menanno, MA is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, and Relationship Coach. Julie operates a clinical therapy practice in Bozeman, Montana, and leads a global relationship coaching practice with a team of trained coaches. She is an expert in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for Couples and specializes in attachment issues within relationships.

Julie is the author of the best-selling book Secure Love, published by Simon and Schuster in January 2024. She provides relationship insights to over 1.3 million Instagram followers and hosts The Secure Love Podcast, where she shares real-time couples coaching sessions to help listeners navigate relational challenges. Julie also hosts a bi-weekly discussion group on relationship and self-help topics. A sought-after public speaker and podcast guest, Julie is dedicated to helping individuals and couples foster secure, fulfilling relationships.

Julie lives in Bozeman, Montana, with her husband of 25 years, their six children, and their beloved dog. In her free time, she enjoys hiking, skiing, Pilates, reading psychology books, and studying Italian.

https://www.thesecurerelationship.com/
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